Life in the Arctic Circle

Officially Christmas???

2009-12-23T14:49:00.006+01:00

Being his father was Jehovah's Witness, my Norwegian husband has never celebrated Christmas nor have I experienced it here in Norway. Thus I don't completely have a hold on the season's traditions but here are some observations nonetheless.

Christmas is not just 1 day here. It is AT LEAST a month long.

- it starts the first Sunday in December when the first advent candle is lit

- there is a lot to get done- cleaning every nook and cranny of the house, changing the curtains and other decor because everything must be RED, baking the 7 types of cookies for Christmas dinner, building a gingerbread house, making an advent calendar for each child with a gift for each day (fun!!!), homemade pork and ham rolls, gløgg and so much more!!!

December 13

- Santa Lucia Day, only some Norwegians celebrate this while it is a must in Sweden...hey, any excuse to add light to this dark period is worth it!

December 23

- the fun begins

- this day actually has a name- Little Christmas Eve

- today many families decorate the tree (a real tree usually), they often have little Norwegian flags strung around it, and eat rice porridge (one lucky eater will get the almond and have a year of good luck), saving the leftovers for the following day

December 24

- other families decorate the tree on this day

- families gather for a big meal together consisting of steamed dried lamb ribs (pinnekjøtt), roasted fresh ham (ribbe) and rutabaga or lutefisk, dessert being the left over rice porridge whipped with cream and topped with a raspberry sauce

- in the evening gifts will be open

Dec 25 thru New Year's Eve

- Christmas continues...many people have off work so there are still Christmas dinners, parties, kid's activities, etc.

- Dec 25 is called the FIRST day of Christmas

- Dec 26 the SECOND day of Christmas

Jan 13

- you better have your lights and tree down by this day because Christmas is officially over!

My nightmare

2009-12-06T22:00:00.003+01:00

Since I'm the early bird of Ben and I, when Ben got up with Phoenix this morning I delighted in the chance to get some extra sleep. Sleep I got but it was marred by this nightmare.

I had invited a bunch of people over. They were flying in from all over the world. I just invited them without planning out anything. It was a Saturday when they started showing up. I was nursing and suddenly I was like, Shoot! I have to get to the store before 6pm because that is when they stop selling beer here in Norway!!! The liquor store (yes, you can only buy liquor/wine at a government owned store) was already closed and wouldn't open again until Wednesday (all true). But while the store where I could purchase beer was just across the street I couldn't get there because it was so icy and I just kept being blown away from the store by the strong wind (yep, its been really icy and windy here lately). When I finally got to the store it was after 6pm so I made my way to another store to buy food but I kept going up all these staircases and could never find the area where they sold groceries. I had to hurry up and get there because the shops close early on Saturdays and nothing is open on Sundays (like in reality). Even more true to life was Ben's reaction in the dream saying, I'm not going to help you. YOU invited them! (But in reality he would save my a** and for that I am grateful!).

When I woke up from the nightmare I decided it wasn't worth going back to sleep. Too real!

Life with Down Syndrome

2009-11-25T09:41:00.010+01:00

So the other day I was in the bathroom with all 3 boys changing Tiago's poopy diaper. Since I have 10 stitches on my knee cap I couldn't get up to turn on the water in the shower. In desperation as to not get poop all over the place, I asked Phoenix to turn it on and HE DID IT! It was so exciting!!! I was yelping and PRAISING him like crazy, "Great job! Thumbs up for following directions!". The whole thing almost brought tears to my eyes; I was so proud of him for being so helpful, responsible and for doing what I asked!

And then I just had to laugh and smile to myself and thank God, seriously, for giving me a child with Down syndrome. We get to be excited about the smallest things! I'm not saying that we have low expectations for Phoenix, but somehow some things are a big deal when Phoenix does them. Not only do we get to get excited a lot, we also get to be part of some pretty cool "clubs"- joining families with a child with DS and special needs in generals in supporting each other and sharing information. Additionally, we now know a plethera of therapists and have gained knowledge from them in areas we never thought of before! Most importantly, Phoenix provides us with opportunities to grow. He challenges us often in the areas of patience (grrrr...I am not always a willing student!), tolerance and human dignity and our own inhibitions.

I grow most when Phoenix acts with a total lack of inhibition. I love when Phoenix laughs really hard in public (the kid even laughs in his sleep!) and/or reaches out to strangers. In terms of laughing, the parent in me wants to tell him, "Use your inside voice", "Not so loud, please, we're on a bus!" because I can't say, "DON'T LAUGH SO HARD! THAT'S BAD MANNERS!". That sounds so ridiculous but I think on some level that is what I mean. I'm uncomfortable with someone just laughing their head off. Its socially abnormal and the fact that my child is doing it embarrasses me. And that is when I'm stretched! Why shouldn't we just have a good belly laugh session on the bus sometimes??? Regarding touching, again the parent in me wants to say, "Control yourself", "Don't touch strangers". But once at church they had this great message called Touch and how important it is, especially when breaking down our fears of the unknown/unfamiliar, for example, people who are handicapped, have special needs, a different ethnic background, whatever our fear is. After that message a woman I didn't know smiled to 2-month-old Phoenix (who had an oxygen cannula in his nose and an oxygen tank beside him) and he gave her a HUGE grin back and this was before he could even smile! She wrote me a letter and told me he had changed her life and that she knew he would continue changing lives. What encouragement for me! So, for the moment, I allow Phoenix to stretch me and stretch others by ignoring certain inhibitions.

I don't have that "perfect angel, sent from God, always happy" Down syndrome child (I doubt that stereotype really exists). He throws fits when he doesn't get his way, often wakes up the whole family at 5:30 am, is a picky eater and just wants to watch tv all the time (this one really gets me!). But in my opinion, I have the most lovable 4-year old son who enriches my family's life daily. Amen!

Motherhood in the Arctic

2009-11-15T21:23:00.007+01:00

On days when both Phoenix and Rio are in daycare I usually take a one-hour walk while Tiago naps in his stroller. I am so thankful for these moments- whether listening to my ipod, walking with another mom or experiencing an awesome sky like this.

This picture was taken at 12 NOON. And, yes, that is the sun SETTING! We haven't seen the sun for weeks and won't see it again until February. While the sun is still above the horizon we see only it's rays because of the mountains. Mørketiden (arctic darkness) is by far not my favorite time of the year, but the light it produces is amazing and unique.

When all the kids are home and not in daycare this can be our day:

Tiago starts wimpering which means it is naptime. Throw some hand-knit wool clothes on him, stuff him in his sheep skin sleeping bag and toss him in the stroller to sleep outside.
Try to motivate Rio and Phoenix to put on their hand-knit wool layer and then their snowsuit, mittens, hat, boots, etc. so we can go outside before it gets dark!!!
Get outside and again try to motivate them, this time to play together nicely.
At about this point Tiago has to start crying so I push him in the stroller while playing referee for Rio and Phoenix.
Get really frustrated and walk away from Rio and Phoenix. What do they do? Rio falls down a hill and I can't find him and Phoenix is sprawled out on the pavement staring into space.
Find the courage to try this again...Tiago falls back asleep, walk with Rio and Phoenix to the "park" (2 swing sets and a sea-saw) where Tiago starts crying again and the boys start arguing.
How does this end? I push Tiago in the stroller for about 30 minutes trying to get him back to sleep while Rio follows me crying "Mama" and Phoenix lays on his belly licking snow. AND I'M CRYING THE WHOLE TIME wondering what I'm doing wrong to make my kids behave like this???!!!

To make matters worse, DH cannot handle situations like this. No empathy. He just thinks I'm nuts to cry about something like this. And then we argue. And argue. Finally, we realize that with 3 kids and everyday life stuff we've put our relationship last and by the time we get to "us" there's no time left in the day or we're just too exhausted to put any effort into it or there's a kid in our bed and a mother-in-law in the living room.

So today when a discussion became a yelling match it actually felt good because we were COMMUNICATING! I felt like I hadn't heard DH's thoughts in ages! Conclusion, it starts at the top. If Mom and Dad are good then chances are the rest of the family are good. GEEZ! WHO WOULD THINK THAT AFTER 13 YEARS OF MARRIAGE AND THE THIRD CHILD THERE WOULD STILL BE SO MUCH TO LEARN!

Treasure Hunt

2009-11-08T13:42:00.006+01:00

Believe me, we're not always this creative!

Phoenix and his pirate booty!

Rio giving a hearty "A-hoy"!

Relaxing and enjoying the spoils.

Check out the pirate tattoo on his leg!

Depression

2009-11-06T13:39:00.008+01:00

Maybe it is post-partumn? The baby blues should be over by now, right? I can be in a funk for days lately. I'm perfectly fine now, loving life, finding joy in motherhood and not complaining about the arctic! But I was so down for about 4 days, in a bad place- withdrawn, hyper-sensitive, anxious, crying, feeling lonely. For the most part I'm able to put on a happy face for the kids, but in other moments I'm dry-heaving trying to cope with a simple task like putting away the clothes or a mistake I made that really anyone could have made. I just beat myself up like crazy telling myself how stupid I am. Once I start with one negative thought I just can't stop until I feel like vomiting.

During all that I went online to check out symptoms of depression. I had to laugh because it was exactly the words that I'd been throwing around in my head- feeling restless, crying a lot, feeling worthless, etc. It said that the treatment was "talk therapy". And then it was SO OBVIOUS how important community is to ME. I love my friends and I love SHARING life with people. I haven't found my place here yet, but I am usually fortunate in that wherever I go I find good people. I'm sure this year in Båtsfjord will be a fantastic adventure, but when things get hard I'm going to especially miss my amazing network back home. I LOVE YOU ALL! I'll be making good use of email and skype then! xxoo

p.s. I love my newly found blogging community as well!

Birthday Boy!

2009-11-05T13:02:00.011+01:00

Showing he is 2 years old.

He ate four cupcakes! And ice cream afterwards.

Fortunately he hasn't lost the cheeks yet! Birthday crown compliments of daycare.

This year our celebration consisted of me, Phoenix and the guest of honor Rio. Whoo-hoo! We ate homemade carrot cake cupcakes (a tradition from my childhood) and watched an 8 minute video I made of Rio.

Better than Vigeland

2009-10-27T13:47:00.006+01:00

"Angry boy"

Phoenix is much more interesting to these Japanese tourist than the sculptures!

Yes, they all wanted individual pictures with the boys!

Phoenix had another idea! A Wiggles dance instead!

Taken in the park by Daddy.

Oslo is home to an amazing sculpture park. Vigeland Park is the largest park of its kind made by one single artist in the world. Covering over 80 acres, Vigeland's lifework contains more than 200 works in bronze, granite and wrought iron.

All that is to say that while surrounded by this spectacular artwork, a group of Japanese tourists stopped to take a ton of pictures of OUR KIDS!!! I guess they thought it was cute that they were walking around the park in their matching rubber boots with a blue guitar in hand. I am especially proud that even though Phoenix looks different they still wanted to take pictures of him. I laughed so hard at the spectacle that I cried!!!

Here are more images from the park:

The Monolith

The Bridge

Google images

Celebrating w/the king at BK

2009-10-12T18:29:00.001+02:00

lover of Pirates
Happy
fOur
affEctionate
woNderful
wIggles fan
eXceptional

Phoenix is 4

2009-10-12T09:46:00.001+02:00

Happy Birthday!

Tiago's birth

2009-08-13T13:54:00.005+02:00

click picture to see the album

If you didn’t see these pictures on facebook already here is the newest edition to our family…introducing Tiago Amante Nystad, born 4 august, 4060g/9pds, 53cm/21in.

Since I was 10 days overdue I was sent to the hospital for a check-up. The hospital is 3 hours away so I was fearful that they would make me stay there and induce me. That is what happened with Rio as I was 12 days overdue and it led to complications in his birth, a long recovery on my part and a little depression.

Ben and I took this amazing CRUISE SHIP to the hospital. We don’t have a car so this was one of our options. We were excited to have a night to ourselves enjoying the onboard luxuries like the outdoor Jacuzzi, the views of the midnight sun, sleeping in and a big breakfast. However, my contractions started only one hour after we boarded the ship. That was exciting!

When we pulled into the final port at Kirkenes, I was in transition. I was laboring infront of all the German tourists. I must have been quite a scene! The ambulance picked us up at the dock and when I arrived at the hospital I was full dialated!!!

It was a great birth with lots of help and support from Ben. But I must admit that I’m a screamer when it comes to pain and I know that Ben was just laughing his butt off behind my back!!! I’m thankful he hid it from me!

Now we are in MAJOR ADJUSTMENT period. Tiago's big brothers are super sweet with him, but Mom has the guilties. Thank you GOD for my husband. He is so helpful and full of lots of grace! AMEN!

well-baby visit

2009-08-13T13:48:00.003+02:00

So we're back in Båtsfjord, Ben's childhood home. It is even farther north than Tromsø and much smaller. Yes, we have moved here! I fought it but there are lots of good reasons to stay here for awhile, most importantly, awesome services for Phoenix...and then there is the small town charm.

Yesterday the nurse CAME TO OUR HOUSE to check Tiago and complete his first well-baby visit. I love that after the visit she sat down with the family and ate a piece of cake and we talked about baking! Small town charm...I hope its enough to keep me "happy" living here on the edge of the earth!

i <3 trash

2009-08-13T13:30:00.004+02:00

Boys are so much fun! Look what they get into! Having fun in the trash containers!

Bros

2009-07-25T00:17:00.001+02:00

Phoenix's new bike

2009-07-09T23:58:00.004+02:00

Phoenix's physical therapist ordered this tricycle for him. It is awesome! It was specially ordered to fit Phoenix's measurements and fits him perfectly. This is the first tricycle he's been able to ride and I hope that he feels empowered. Yes, Rio's scream in the beginning is entertaining too! We received the bike from www.pointbike.de

Moving SUCKS!

2009-07-08T23:51:00.005+02:00

Not if it means you get to watch The Wiggles all day!

We lived like this the whole last week before our move.

AND I DIDN'T EVEN DO ANYTHING! I am so blessed because my mother-in-law and Ben did all the packing. I tried to watch the kids, but being near the end of my pregnancy and short on energy and patience, The Wiggles did most of the baby sitting.

But isn't packing just one of the worst things in the whole world? Even if you're going on a fantastic vacation it still sucks, I think. In our case, we're packing and still don't know where we'll be UNpacking. We're at Ben's mom's house for the moment but have a goal of being in southern Norway by September 1st. But Ben doesn't have a job and we might just end up closing our eyes and putting our finger on the map and moving there!!!

Risøya

2009-07-08T17:42:00.008+02:00

My beautiful Phoenix amongst an amazing backdrop!

The whole of risøya. The white house was built in 1856.

View north from the summit of risøya- 104 meters above sea level.

In a way I love that when you're about to leave a place you actually make an effort to do all the things you had planned on doing when you actually had time! But at the last minute you try to fit everything in. Spending a weekend at a cabin was one of those things.

My wonderful co-worker Kenth invited our family to join his family at his cabin on the island Risøya. Since the queen of Norway had once visited there, we couldn't say no! We drove one hour out of town to pick up a ferry which sailed about 1.5 hours before reaching the small island northwest of Tromsø island. We sailed amongst the various islands dotted with cabins dropping of passengers as we went. It was a cool yet sunny day.

Risøya was established by Kenth's great-great grandfather. At one time 30-40 people inhabited the island. There was a bakery, a fish oil factory and a down feather factory. Russian fisherman would come into shore to trade their goods. Today there are no longer any permanent residents. Kenth and his relatives utilize the main house and the fisherman's houses as cabins. Once the snow is gone they are there every weekend and spend their entire summer vacations there.

As you can see, there isn't much to do there and that is what cabin life is about! Taking it easy. Taking it slow. Watching the clouds, talking about the weather, predicting the weather, hikes, catching crabs and boat trips on the little outboard. Kenth's daughters enjoyed swimming in the frigid water with their wet suits. Ben and I enjoyed the good food and wonderful company, while Phoenix and Rio spent their days throwing rocks in the water, playing in the sand and "flirting" with the girls!!! It was a fantastic getaway before the stress of moving began!!!

Belly Painting

2009-06-14T21:01:00.003+02:00

2am in the land of the midnight sun

Being pregnant brings on new experiences. This time around it was belly painting! And it was so fun.

Like I said, we have met some great people here in Tromsø. Katrine is definitely one of the coolest and the one that I wish I could have gotten to know better. She has three adorable girls, her third is the same age as Rio, and a charming boyfriend who I voted "best dressed" at Rio's birthday. While she works in the hospital's pathology lab, she has a wildly creative spirit. Among other things, she loves capturing the mother-child relationship through the camera lense; she recently started to paint bellies and photograph them.

Inspired by mexican folk art, we designed this sun. She turned on some Billy Holiday and started painting freehand with theater make-up. We then did a photo shoot behind a white backdrop but I like the ones outside the best. In all my shyness, I was not easy to work with. But this was a special moment dedicated solely to baby number three whom I really haven't had much time to think about.

Thank you, Katrine! I will never forget this...or you!

Money well spent

2009-06-09T22:42:00.003+02:00

Saturday we threw a going-away party for OURSELVES!!! It was simple- hot dogs, Ben's famous 7-layer dip and his famous almond tart (yes, i married well!). While we have many complaints about living so far north in Norway we met a lot of good people up here. We will miss them- and the mountains- the most!

Sunday was spent at the carnival. As at any carnival one spends a lot of money on ridiculous things like trying to break a plate with a ball just to win for your kids a couple of stupid ties that they don't even like!!! But to see the joy on their faces when they rode on that "boring" train for the third time was priceless!

Inform yourself

2009-06-08T23:20:00.004+02:00

Watch the movie Zeitgeist for free online- thought-provoking and informative.

Pinse holiday

2009-06-01T21:50:00.008+02:00

Phoenix and Papa across from the cafe.

Mama and Phoenix sharing a panini during the 1 hour that it actually stopped raining.

p.s. Rio was sleeping in the stroller when we took these pictures.

I love living in a Lutheran country with no separation of church and state, because it means we get a ton of days off!!! For example, Christmas eve, Christmas and then usually the whole week until New Year's Day. Easter means you have off Thursday THRU Monday, then Ascension Day (the day Jesus returned to heaven 40 days after being crucified) and now Pinse (the day man was given the holy spirit, 50 days after the crucifixion).

Many people in northern Norway refer to Pinse as "Pinseria" because it is usually when Old Man Winter throws one more snow at us. And he succeeded this year. YUP, it is June 1st and we've been hit with a terrible week of rain, wind and even some snowflakes. Supposedly the reindeer calves are being born this weekend and they need to be born on fresh snow. STILL, it has been raining daily for 7 days now! The boys are back in their snowsuits and frankly, we've been depressed! After months and months of winter we need, DESERVE a break! SEND SUN!

Three Billy Goats Gruff

2009-05-28T21:09:00.002+02:00

If you didn't know, this tale originated in Norway. I have this terrible English transition of the story that I just have to share with you.

So the third goat comes over the bridge and the troll says he's going to gobble him up and the goat responds "Well, come along! I've got two spears, and I'll poke your eyeballs out at your ears. I've got besides two great big stones, and I'll crush you to bits, body and bones." Graphic, huh? Maybe this shouldn't be a bedtime story!

Stockholm

2009-05-27T22:20:00.006+02:00

We visit and take a picture at this cafe every time we are in Stockholm.

I have the best husband in the world for so many reasons. But most recently he took care of the boys while I traveled solo for 5 days to visit my dear friend Viola.

God has blessed my life with amazing friends from around the world such that neither time nor distance seems to affect our friendships. Viola is no exception. We haven't seen each other in 7 years and haven't lived on the same continent for a decade. Still, we have always kept in contact. Usually when we call each other one of us says, "I was just about to call you!". It is so wonderful.

Viola lives in Stockholm and I have visited her or we have travelled together often through the city in between one of our many hitchhiking trips in Europe. So I have probably been to Stockholm 2o times. Thus, I was there to see Viola and not the city.

It was an inspiring, reflective and restful trip. I was inspired by Viola and her gorgeous apartment. We reflected over the years of our friendship, the big changes in our recent lives and laughed and appreciated the good old days. In terms of rest, sleeping until 10 am, using hours to eat breakfast and get ready and low expectations like getting a good latte and cinnamon roll. I WAS IN ANOTHER WORLD and for the moment it was glorious! I appreciated it while simultaneously not desiring that life. But, hey, it is the PERFECT life when you need a vacation!!!

Stockholm is only 5 hours from Oslo so I really look forward to moving there and being near Viola.

Norway wins Eurovision song contest!

2009-05-19T23:44:00.004+02:00

HIPP HIPP HURRA for Norway! But most Americans have no idea what I'm talking about!

So, Eurovision is a song contest. Each country chooses one song to represent themselves and then people all over Europe vote for the best song, but it is not possible to vote for your own country. However, voting can be quite political- Scandinavian countries voting for each other, the same goes for eastern European countries, etc. The contest was started in 1956 and until recently you had to sing in your own language. Europeans love this contest! Previous winners include ABBA and Celine Dion so this is a very prestigious title!

Hear the song that won it all! http://www.eurovision.tv/

Spring Fever

2009-05-15T22:56:00.002+02:00

So it is light 24 hours a day now and will be for about 3 months (don't forget that means we have 3 months of darkness too, but lets not think about that). You would think it was summer here. Our kids run around half-naked and take their baths outside. It is actually only 55F here but after 6 months of winter we'll take it! The weather really is fantastic, sunny and warm on your face (if you can get away from the cool breeze). The kids are outside all the time and it is fun and to run around with them.

Milestones- The boys have been talking a little more. Phoenix's vocabulary consists of "mama", "ice", "Rio" and "boobs" (he's always looking down my shirt so...). Rio says "mama", "papa" (actually he only whispers the word- it is so cute!), "barnehage" (daycare in Norwegian) and "China" (he has panda bears on his pajamas). It's fun to dream that someday Rio might study panda bears in China and that Phoenix will work as a field hand on a farm- he knows so many animal signs and puts on his cowboy outfit and boots at least once a day! Or he might be a Wiggle! He even made up his own sign for The Wiggles. Kind of annoying because he signs it all day and then wants us to put a DVD on for him. But my biggest dream for Phoenix is that one day he would sing the 7th inning stretch at Wrigley Field. We sing it every time he wears one of his many Cubs shirts!

Other than that, things are kind of coming to a close around here. We move out June 30 and now its time to tie up loose ends, fit in seeing everyone one last time and trying to do the tourist things we talk about doing but haven't done.